Grace's Report on Devil's Tuesday

So apparently, because it was the sixth of June on 2006, we were supposed to have some sort of heretical calendar convergence that's denoting Luficer's presence, as a day. Yes, today we will pay the devil his due in this manufactured allotment of unholy misbehavior. I don't know how this happened, I would have thought people at least gifted enough to have the whole thing thrown off by the zero in 6/6/06, but apparently we like the Satan more than we like our memories of passing simple elementary school math.

This is good for the slackers out there. Now you can blame the malefic forces of darkness for your shitty math grades. It's not the inhereted lack of algebra skills from your retarded parents, or the pill-sponsored ADHD your doc says you have, no, it's Beelzebub himself who made you flunk out of math.

Go humanity, you bright shining star.

It's also Punch An Emo Kid day, which has resulted in gratuitous amounts of sheep-brained people posting that excitingly adorable little promo poster for it, and a prolific sense of violent bigotry towards the most hated (yet most obscenely prevalent) sub-sect of humanity these days.

I was simply unaware, you know, we needed a specific day to punch emo kids.

I thought punching emo kids was something for every day. For a bit of stress relief. For when you see one of the little girl-jeans wearing shits ordering coffee at your favorite cafe. For when you see them walking on the street, talking about the utter suckitude of life in a way that would make the most nihilistic of goth kids roll their eyes and backhand them with one of those spikey wristlets.

But no. Now we need mandated Emo Punching Days.

Now, trust me. I want those emo kids hurt as much as possible. Some days I want to find a little emo crackbaby and torture it in the most brutal way possible. That would not only be amusing, but also well worth the intial amusement, which would be force-feeding an emo mother crack. Let's cut the ears of their whiny little corpses and make necklaces out of them a la Vietnam.

The only thing more that really ticks me off about this day is the fact that all the prophesies lied to me. 666 my ass, it's 6606. Nostradamus obviously failed math...because of the devil! Revelation (NOT RevelationS) is a lie! (calm down, I'm only half serious)

...yeah, I think this entry just turned into Apocalypse Now meets The Omen.

- the infamous ms. grace